Knowing well that the words that I am penning down are not sufficient enough to describe how difficult it is to lose someone whom we love so dearly, yet I am doing this to share my feelings through words.
He was extremely kind, caring, and loving. From young to old, he loved his family so much that they all wanted to spend time with him. I feel myself blessed to have a special bond with him.
Since my childhood, I remember him as a gigantic personality. I was too small then. He was the first one to take me on innumerable bike rides, which developed an interest in long bike rides in me. I still remember the way I used to sit behind him and hold him tight with my tiny hands, of course struggling to get around his gigantic tummy yet enjoying those long rides.
On one occasion, we were unable to celebrate 'Diwali' (since it was customary in families to abstain from performing rituals for certain reasons). But it was relaxed for the kids at home. The fact that I couldn't get a new dress and crackers made me quite unhappy. However, to my great surprise, Mama unexpectedly brought home new cloth material for all of us along with sweets and savouries. It was pouring 'dogs and cats' that day, but I remember rushing to a nearby tailor to stitch the dress material he got me. I still remember vividly the green dress that he brought me for Diwali. In addition, he took us to his house to celebrate Diwali, as we were unable to do it at home that year. A special Diwali to me indeed.
Later, I moved and stayed at his house for a short while to study. I still think of those days as the best times of my childhood. He used to look after me really nicely. His entire family still adores me, not just him. The Diwalis I celebrated at his place were the times I used to burst bundles of crackers since he was the only one who could get me so much of whatever I wished to burst.
He became more like a guide and friend to me as I grew older, letting me express what I felt. He supported me on multiple occasions and helped me get over some of the challenges I encountered in high school. His love for me has never changed in any circumstance, and his bonding with my parents too. He never allowed the normal qualms that exist between elders in the family to impact his love for me. The love that he had for me was so much that I was always addressed by him as 'thangam', 'chellam' until the last video conversation that we had a couple of days before he left for his heavenly abode.
He used to be there for me through thick and thin and has never missed a celebration in my life. There are so many beautiful memories with him that will last for a lifetime.
As a traditional person in his outlook who never allowed his own daughter to wear a salwar kameez, he compromised that for me and permitted me to wear a salwar kameez, which was new and trending in those days. He used to call me 'sundeli' (rat) fondly since I kept moving freely and happily at his place during my stay. There were times when we sang songs to relax, and he would surprise me by singing the new songs of that time. He was loved by many, and always someone was around him at home fondly calling him 'Appa' since he was guiding and helping many irrespective of their caste or creed.
This tribute can go on forever since there are so many fond memories to share. Not only I miss him dearly, but my husband and child too miss him, as he has made a home for himself in their hearts. Periya Mama's house, I guess, is the only place where my husband stays comfortably for days during vacations since that is the way his entire family welcomes him. I'm sure his place will remain a 'go-to place' for me forever since his family carries forward his legacy of welcoming everyone wholeheartedly. We will miss his kindness and his smile, which are indelibly stamped in my memory and my heart.
We will meet again in another dimension or in another lifetime, mama; until then, may Bhagwan Krishna keep you safe in his lotus feet.
Love you, Periya Mama! - Suganthi Sankaran (Vidya for him)
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